Time, a rare and highly valued commodity

Time for ourselves has become a rare and highly valuable commodity.  In this post I start by highlighting  unique perspectives on the availability of time for ourselves, then list a few of my pet peeves—ways in which others rob us of time and our ability to make the most of it.

Thinking about the importance of reserving time for ourselves I’m always reminded of a conversation I had with (the late) Jim Rouse, at that time one of America’s true pioneers of planned communities (Columbia, Maryland) and regional shopping malls. I asked if he would be willing to fly from Baltimore to San Diego, on the occasion of the dedication of the Ernest W. Hahn Endowed Chair in Real Estate Finance at the University of San Diego, to speak on behalf of his good friend and fellow mall developer, Ernie Hahn. I was to be the first holder of the Hahn Chair.

Because I knew Jim I hoped he might agree to honor his friend Ernie by speaking at the dedication. Rouse, at that time aged 80+, was kind and thoughtful in his response: “Fortunately or unfortunately, I have more money than time.  I will be happy to make a major gift to the endowment but cannot afford the time to fly from Baltimore to San Diego.”   I’ve never forgotten his phrase about not being able to “afford” the time. It conveyed thoughtful consideration of his personal time-versus-value proposition as well as his relative priorities, great ways to evaluate one’s own investment of time. 

Another interesting perspective came from successful young San Diego-based professionals. I’d asked them:  Looking backward 50 years from now, what would the city have had to do to make you glad you stayed here to pursue your career and raise a family? The most common response was for the region to promote itself better as a hub of sophisticated businesses: high-tech, bio-tech, blue-tech, international trade, universities, medical research and medicine, all great assets for the future of this economy.  Second priority was for the city to quit infringing upon their time to unwind and enjoy San Diego’s natural resources, especially its ocean beaches and parks.  Too much development and too much traffic hurt their ability to access beaches and parks within the limited time frames they could allocate to recreation.  One line summed it up best: “San Diego is headed in the wrong direction.”

Another aspect of this discussion  is down-time, a necessary and mentally refreshing investment of time to recharge one’s batteries. Everyone needs to figure out for themselves the best way to build it into their regular schedules. It is not a-hit-or-miss proposition.  Nor is it the same thing as a vacation. For most people vacations are as busy, or even busier, than their daily lives. Vacations tend to offer a change of venue but not necessarily a change of pace. Also, vacations only happen a few times a year at most, whereas down-time should be taken frequently. 

Let me share a personal practice that has worked well for about 20 years.  My wife and I reserve every Sunday for one another.  Whatever we do on a Sunday, we do together.  If someone invites one but not both of us to an activity, we automatically decline. One benefit we did not explicitly anticipate when starting our Sundays-together policy was in most cases they have turned out to be slower and less hectic than weekdays.  We might have one “major” activity, like a movie, going to the theater or spending time with our children and grandchildren, but that’s it.  It’s almost as if we are in slow motion on Sundays.  We've created mutually enjoyable down-times without really trying.

On the flip side, I can’t resist listing five pet peeves involving others who either save time or make more time available for themselves by encroaching on my time.  I would enjoy learning about yours.

1.       Drivers who cut into freeway entry and exit lanes at the last second, forcing everyone else to brake and wait (impatiently) a little bit longer for their turn

2.      Golfers in too much of a hurry (or who are too inconsiderate) to replace divots or rake bunkers, leaving those chores to foursomes behind them

3.      Golfers who labor over putts as if their lives depended upon sinking every one, thereby distracting and delaying everyone else in their foursome or the ones behind them

4.     Theater-goers who arrive late for performances and invariably must climb over on-time arrivals already settled comfortably in their seats

5.     Theater managers who delay the opening curtain to accommodate late arrivals, thereby acting as enablers, rather than requiring the late-comers to wait in the lobby until intermission—a practice guaranteed to cure the problem quickly

Enough said.